


Resentment

by eowyn_of_rohan



Category: The West Wing
Genre: Angst, F/M, Josh/Donna Unhappy Ending, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-02-15
Updated: 2016-02-15
Packaged: 2018-05-20 21:41:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 380
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6026080
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/eowyn_of_rohan/pseuds/eowyn_of_rohan
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She's not proud of any of this.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Resentment

**Author's Note:**

> Dashed off in one draft. I may write a follow-up from Josh or Sam's perspective if anyone wants that.

She’s not proud of the reason why she shows up at Josh’s door and drags him to bed despite his halfhearted protest that he’s exhausted from the trip to California.

She’s not proud that she wears a lacy thong and moans at the appropriate intervals solely because she’s afraid of what might have been rekindled when Josh flew out to recruit his Deputy Chief of Staff.

She’s not proud of faking her orgasm.  
(She didn’t minor in drama for nothing.)

She’s not proud that she’s still afraid of the specter of Sam Seaborn.

She’s not proud that she’s kept that secret all these years for them, even though they never knew she had stumbled upon it to begin with.

She’s not proud that she had smiled when Sam decided to stay in California with his tail between his legs after his campaign tanked.

She’s not proud that she’s still chasing after Josh even though he’s lost almost all of the spark and humor and energy that made her fall in love to begin with.

She’s not proud of how resentful she feels after taking the honorable way out.  
(“You’re turning down Hawaii?"  
“No, I’m turning down a forced vacation you’re only going to take because it’s what will keep Sam in Washington.”  
“That’s not why I’m doing this!”  
“I need there to be only two people in whatever it is we might have, and that’s obviously not going to happen.”  
“I don’t understand.”  
“Yes, you do.”  
“Donna--”  
“I know, Josh. Can we leave it at that before we both embarrass ourselves?”)

She’s not proud when she lies to C.J. and Mrs. Santos and her mother and _his_ mother about why it never worked out.

She’s not proud that she pins all the blame on him when she made her own choices.

She’s not proud that she goes out of her way to avoid being alone in a room with Sam for two full terms.

She’s not proud when -- after President Santos finishes his eight years and she’s somewhat-happily married to an anesthesiologist, and Sam’s brief marriage has failed and Josh has nothing left to lose -- she cries at the picture of them holding hands when it hits the _Post_.

She’s not proud that she can’t be happy for them.


End file.
